Q1. I'm at my Witt's end my son will be 3 next week and will not go on the potty or toilet what can I do I've tried many times and he starts a nursery unit soon and they have to be toilet trained

A1. Take a piece of A4 paper write his name on saying Joshua .I wear big pants now. put a picture of a potty or toilet on the front and makes some squares to place a sticker in.get a pack of reward stickers from a supermarket if u can find his favourite character ie Fireman Sam, Spiderman tell him he can have a sticker if he goes on the toilet wearing big pants too no more nappies except pull ups at bedtime.He gets a sticker for the toilet and if he cant make it and goes on potty instead also gets a sticker. When its full he gets a big prize. He may want the stickers and not a big prize but just ignore him. Put the chart on the bathroom door with blue tac.if he misses  wets pants and will not go  or just stands there  then no sticker at all.Do not ball and shout at just put fresh pants and and ignore it. stick to your guns in a day or so he will be toilet trained if you follow through. It wont take long now because he is older than a baby would say at 12 months plus.

Q.2. My son is two and manages  to go on toilet but does nothing as yet what shall I do.

A.2.Watch him every time he goes give him lots of praise for the first wee and watch his little face light up in happiness. He will soon get the hang of it the first wee is the hardest as they learn to control their bladder.he may look down in the toilet or potty as he realises the first wee is coming this is when you have to praise him as it will be the most remembered.Then its easy from here.

Q3. my son screams and won't sit down on the potty help he is 2 and a half.

try to let daddy go with him, get a child step and a toddler toilet seat  so he can stand up like daddy does on his own step forget the potty he can always use this later as he overcomes his fear. At first only let him sit on toilet for a few seconds even if he screams here too.Ignore a scream say yeah and oh dear no wee wee yet lets try again afterwards . take him away .then let him try again in afternoon for 1 minute say yeah and oh no wee wee yet lets try again afterwards and so on longer each time you go. Its not the fact that he has to do the wee first but its to overcome the fear of sitting on a toilet.After a few persistent attempts at sitting he will no longer scream for you. 

Q 4 Which is best my mum says knickers and i say she should wear pull ups which should i use both.

Form 25 years experience at toilet training toddlers this works best.When you are going to start have a plan...

• not when you are starting moving house
• not when there are too many changes happening ie starting nursery,daddy starting a different job longer hours etc.
•  not when a new baby sibling has just been born
• Buy loads of cheap cotton knicks or  boys underpants not expensive so you Can throw a spoiled pair away on trips out.The reason i say knicks or underpants is this a child needs to know what it feels like to be wet. As a Pull up absorbs the fluid its taken away from direct skin contact. When cotton ones are worn a child learns that oh this feels uncomfortable when he or she has had an accident in them so is more likely to us the  toilet just like a big person would ie  mummy or daddy.
• A child running around cannot tell they are wet in a pull-up so would just carry one playing not knowing any difference.
• Ditch the nappies one day and use pull ups just for bedtime so a start is a start and you don't go backwards in toilet training.

Q5. My daughter is terrified and wont do a poop in the toilet she jumps off then waits to have a new nappy back on hiding behind the sofa where no one can see her and then does it there.

A.5.give set meal times  over a few days and see when she does do a poo. time it about right and let her sit on toilet with a big girl book one which she gets only if she sits on toilet for quite a little longer than normal.Stand outside the door waiting and say shall i stay here until you are finished darling and respect her privacy. stay there and help her use toilet roll afterwards. increase the length of time as she starts to sit longer for you.Give her a pack of big girl bum wipes as a special treat just for her to use at the side of the toilet for her bum all freshly clean.